II Corinthians 10:12 For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.
I know better. I have preached it. It makes for much harder living than it does preaching. I am not wise when I compare myself to others. I measure myself by others. I want to see how I rank in the kingdom. I want to know if I get to sit on the right hand or the left. I want to know if I will be one of the 3 that get to go and pray with Jesus while the other 8 are told to wait.
I know so much better than this but it is a trap I fall into all the time. I should keep my head down and do my job. I should be trusting and obeying instead I am comparing and measuring.
When I measure and compare I feel pride or frustration. Most of the time I can find so many more that are more blessed than me. I can think of how God is blessing them more than He is me. It causes me to feel great frustration.
Why is it that God blesses them more than me. I work hard. Is there something wrong with me? Why doesn’t He like me like He likes them? These are all thoughts from the devil. I was told by the Lord right here in this verse that I shouldn’t be hung up comparing myself or measuring myself with others but I am doing so any way.
I seem to get pleasure out of this disobedience. It makes me feel good to feel bad. I can blame God for not blessing me. This leads me to pouting and not working as hard as I was working.
I am not sure if you deal with this temptation like I do but I want victory. I want to obey God in my thought life. I am working on it more now than I ever have in my life. I will live out the victory that He has given me!