Today’s reading I Kings 3-5
I Kings 3:11 And God said unto him, Because thou hast asked this thing, and hast not asked for thyself long life; neither hast asked riches for thyself, nor hast asked the life of thine enemies; but hast asked for thyself understanding to discern judgment;
Solomon asked for wisdom instead of what any “logical, carnal” human would have asked for. God gave him the wisdom he asked for and then blessed him financially also.
As I read the verse the part that stands out to me is “hast not asked for thyself!” I am afraid that I often if not most of the time ask for myself. I try to veil my selfish desires but they are all painfully obvious.
I want God to use me but that really translates often to, God make me special, make much of me, get people to look at me, get people to think highly of me!
I ask God to meet my financial needs but that is most often a cover for I want more stuff. I ask Him to bless my preaching but that is often so people will think well of me.
I make excuses for it all but it is still the truth. I am selfish and love to ask for myself.
I have no idea if this idea might help you or not, but it helps me! I want to learn to forget me, put me in the background, and decrease so that He can increase.