1. He can be grieved (Ephesians 4:30). This refers to our current attitude and lifestyle (Ephesians 4:30–5:7). Here is what grieves the Holy Spirit: (1) bitterness; (2) anger; (3) slander; (4) holding a grudge; (5) sexual immorality; (6) greed; (7) obscene jokes. (b) I grieve the Spirit inwardly if I give in to any of the above.

  2. Two cautions: We almost never know we grieve the Spirit at first; we discover later that is what we did (Judges 16:20). Grieving the Spirit does not mean that he utterly leaves us (John 14:16; Ephesians 4:30).

  3. What happens when I grieve the Holy Spirit: confusion replaces clarity. Jesus will not be real. The Spirit, since he is grieved, will not remind me of things. The Spirit will not guide me into all truth. He can be quenched (1 Thessalonians 5:19).

  4. This primarily refers to the Spirit at work in others, e.g., the church. Grieving the Spirit is an ‘inward’ malady. Quenching the Spirit is an ‘outward’ malady. I quench the Spirit when: I hurt a weaker brother (1 Corinthians 8:9ff.). I judge a weaker brother (Romans 14:10). I speak against what God may want to do, especially when revival may be involved. I say or do things that divide God’s people. This sin is called schism. I do or say anything that will give an uneasy feeling among God’s people.

  5. When the Spirit is quenched it means his flow to the church is cut off. Unfortunately it is an easy thing to do. Unfortunately when it occurs, it is not easy to bring back the unquenched Spirit. This is why church unity is to be prized possibly above all other wishes.

R. T. Kendall, Understanding Theology, Volume One (Ross-shire, Great Britain: Christian Focus, 1996), 176–177.