Getting rid of bitterness is a step–by–step process that leads toward emotional liberation and spiritual freedom. The steps are simple. As you are reading this, the face of someone toward whom you feel bitter has probably come to mind. Keep that person (or persons) in mind as you continue.

  1. Make a list of the ways in which that person has offended you.

  2. Make a list of your own faults.

  3. Make a list of things you have done and for which God has forgiven you.

  4. Ask God to help you view that person who has wronged you as a tool in the hand of God.

  5. Ask God to forgive you for your bitterness toward that person.

  6. Decide in your heart to assume total responsibility for your attitude.

  7. If you feel it is appropriate, and will not cause more problems than it solves, go to that person, confess your bitterness, and ask for forgiveness. Remember, you are assuming the responsibility for your attitude; you are not trying to solicit repentance.

We have but two choices. We can allow bitterness to destroy us, or we can allow God to develop us into the persons He wants us to be. We must choose to view our circumstances and hurts as tools to be used by God to further develop our spiritual lives.

Charles F. Stanley, The Gift of Forgiveness (Nashville, TN: Oliver Nelson, 1991), 155–156.